Heavy Hearted

So all of you probably know by now that we are moving to Wisconsin. Jonah will be working with his dad doing wood packages for antique cars and probably some cabinets as well. We have been planning to move for a while but have decided to move up the time frame due to a lack of work here. So we are embarking on this new adventure. I am sad as you all know (especially those of you who have spent time crying with me over the last week). I have lived in Colorado my entire life, barely even venturing out of the state for a vacation. Now we are moving across the country. This is not really the part that makes me sad. Although I will miss the mountains, Jonah has never understood people lamenting a lose of a view of the Peak or talking about how beautiful the peak looks with snow on it. But maybe there is something that just gets into the deep part of you. I love to go to the mountain on a sunny day and smell the pine needle baking in the sun (Jonah would say rotting) it is a smell that instantly takes me back to a time when I was a little girl and I would go to the mountain with my Grandparents. But I could do without the mountains if I had to. No of course I am saddened to move so far from all of the people that I love so much. People that I see every week or just a few times a year. The treasured ones in my life that have shaped the person that I am today. My heart aches at the thought of all of the missed moments that I could have spent with them, all of the lost opportunities that I had to make their lives just a little better by a kind word or gesture. I know that I am only moving a to WI not the moon and in this day of the Internet, digital camera, and cell phones that we can keep in touch easier that ever. But I know that I am easily complacent and I feel things so strongly that sometimes it is easier to shut people out rather than to take a chance in getting hurt or letting them be disappointed in me. So I close myself off. I am sorry. I am sorry to those of you who have been affected by this. I wish I was a better Daughter, Granddaughter, Sister, Aunt, and Friend. I will try to do better and hope that I will do better job at letting you know how precious you are to me and that I think of you all the time.